You've got a great goal. You either want to lose some body fat, build some muscle, improve your overall health, add quality years to your life, etc. Your goal could be an number of things, but one thing is for certain, you WANT it.
You know when you accomplish that goal how great you will feel about it. All the necessary effort you put forth will come to a pinnacle of pride and satisfaction. You're going to be lean, strong, healthy and it's going to feel so good.
But! And you knew there was going to be a 'but', your work schedule has gotten CRAZY lately. Your boss is generally a bit of an asshole, but these days he is piling on several extra tasks at the end of the day causing you to stay late. This is really affecting your gym and meal prep time.
Not only that but chicken breast is starting to taste like cardboard, you're getting tired of eggs, and you don't have a fridge at work.
This is getting tough. On top of all of that, you have to take your kid to soccer practice twice a week and no one seems to be supportive of your goals.
Basically, there is NOTHING but obstacles between you and your goals. In your mind, these are the differences between you and anyone else who is able to hit the gym regularly and accomplish these goals.
This is also where you're wrong.
When your focus is on your problems and obstacles, all you can see is more problems and more obstacles. You get so used to focusing on nothing but problems that you can't even take your eyes off them to entertain a solution for even a second.
It's like when you're driving a car down the road and something catches your eye off the shoulder. You find yourself staring at whatever it is that caught your eye, and the car starts drifting in that direction.
When you are on the path that ultimately leads to your goals but you keep staring off at your problems, your end up moving in that direction. All you see is problems, and you're driving directly into more problems. This means that despite the fact that there are TONS of solutions to your problems, you aren't even looking at them.
It's important to establish something right off the bat. Your problems are not unique, and they are dealt with successfully by people every day. This is good news, because it means it CAN be done.
You aren't the only person who works a 60hr work week. In fact the 40 hr work week is all but dead. People are hustling these days. Other people have families full of issues and emergencies the same way you do. Many other people also suffer from fatigue, extra responsibilities outside of work, and less than ideal circumstances.
The actual difference lies in the focus. When you're focused on your problems, all you're going to see are problems and an onslaught of new obstacles. On the flip side, when you shift your focus back to the path that leads to your goals, you ALWAYS find a solution to those obstacles.
Sometimes you need help finding a solution to your obstacles, and that's where a great coach comes in. Since your problems are not all that unique, your coach has more than likely helped hundreds of other people blow past that same obstacle. The key is that you need to be willing to take your eyes off of your problems and execute the solution.
Here's the thing about the solution. It is never magical and it is never easy. In fact, in almost every case the solution will require MORE work from you. In many cases it will require you to sacrifice TV time or general down time. It will definitely require you to sacrifice your excuses.
This is the part where you examine yourself to see where your focus is really directed. What is dominating your perspective? Is it an onslaught of endless problems? Or are you focused on your path? So focused that any time you encounter an obstacle you are able to plan away around it, then most importantly, execute that plan so you are back to sprinting towards your goals?
It is all about where you direct your focus, and this is what affects your mind set. The good news is you can make the conscious decision to change that focus right now. All you need to do is turn your focus away from your problems, direct it at your path of execution, and promise yourself you will not look away. Promise yourself you will execute your daily plan, and promise yourself that no matter what you encounter on this path, you will get past it. You may not know exactly HOW you will get past it, but you will.
I'll leave you with this. Once you have your plan laid out, shut off your brain, and execute the plan. Some thinking and planning will be required to maneuver around obstacles, but once that solution is established, revert right back into execution mode. No thinking, no wasted time on complaining, just a dead sprint towards your goals.
That is how successful trainees do it, and that is what will work for you too.